#reverb11

Jan 25

Reflections on Reverb11

After a powerful experience, do you ever find yourself a bit numb—emotionally drained? Do you retreat to the safety of restorative activities that enable you to create some distance between you and the experience? This time for restoration is essential to your ability to digest and process the experience.

During the Reverb11 journey, I noticed that many prompts touched on experiences too close to the surface for analysis. Rather than try to rush the process, I found that I gained clarity by simply noticing that more time was needed. Most importantly, I realized that the act of reflecting does not mean you need to generate grand patterns and interpretations. The act of showing up and reflecting does not need to generate anything new. The experience itself is nourishing.

After a few days away from Reverb11, I spent some time reflecting on the experience. I’ve shared these raw reflections below. Thank you for showing up and sharing this journey with me.

The Good

- My prompt responses brought a new sense of vulnerability to the blog. This vulnerability is scary yet extremely liberating.

- My relationship to comments changed, for the positive. Prior to Reverb11, I was easily let down when a blog post generated very few or no comments. I questioned my content and my identity as a blogger. I was so immersed in writing and interacting with other reverbers that I don’t know which posts generated higher or lower numbers of comments. I love the posts that I created during this time and feel much more comfortable with my role as a blogger. I don’t need a certain number of comments to validate this for me.

- I loved having the Reverb11 Facebook group to vent and connect with others in real time. I definitely want to create a Facebook group for this blog in the near future.

- I responded to all 31 prompts (which I didn’t think I could do). My goal at the beginning was to complete 15 of the 31 prompts. I guess I underestimated myself!

- I loved collaborating with Tiffany on this project. It was so much fun and something I want to do more of in the future.

- 54 people joined the Reverb11 community via the Facebook group (amazing!). This number seemed like the perfect amount. It never felt too crowded and voices never got lost in the mix.

The Not So Good

- The community prompt responses felt scattered. It was difficult to find responses from other reverbers to particular prompts, which I would have loved.

- The linky list disappeared on the reverb11 page on January 1st! Next time, I need to remember to extend the expiration date on the list before the list expires. I was hoping to have the linky list permanently available on the reverb11 page for reference.

- Daily blogging takes a lot of time! I loved journaling my responses to the prompts in my actual journal, but dreaded actually plugging everything in online, editing photos, adding tags, and so on. I would have felt more at ease during the experience if I were able to focus 80% of my time on the creative process and 20% of my time on the administrative process.

- I spent more time online during the holidays rather than offline in restorative mode. I’m happy I noticed this and hope to strike a better balance during reverb12.

The Takeaways

- I am eager to spearhead more community projects.

- Embrace spontaneity. Tiffany and I began this project on December 1st and just went with the flow!

- I surprised myself a lot during the experience (in a good way!). I want to remember this :).

- When a project is meaningful, you don’t focus on the end game the entire time, you are in the moment, immersed in the weeds. This is good. Relish the change in scenery and be sure to notice the beauty within the process.

- Deadlines are helpful and creating personal deadlines illuminate a sense of structure that you crave. But don’t defeat yourself with a deadline. Be flexible if you need a bit more time—especially if you’re enjoying the ride. (I needed an additional 3 weeks to complete reverb11)

- Practice and repetition are very wise teachers.

- I will definitely be hosting reverb12, save the date :).

…

p.s. have you entered the shabby apple giveaway (it is open until fri evening)!

image: pinwheel designs

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Jan 21

Less No, More Yes

I can’t believe today’s post represents the end of Reverb11. The Reverb11 journey has been truly incredible. I hope to spend some time next week reflecting on this experience and share these reflections with you.

Below are my responses to the last two prompts. I used these prompts as a way to pull together some of the major themes from my responses thus far. It was a great way for me to take a step back and see the big take home messages.

Even if you didn’t participate in Reverb11, or maybe started but didn’t finish, I highly recommend exploring these two prompts as a separate exercise.

30. No. What will you say no to in 2012?
31. Yes. What will you say yes to in 2012 that you didn’t say yes to in 2011?

I approached these prompts as one.

NO < YES [the goal: less NO, more YES]

Less No, More Yes

No: Self-defeating language (e.g., I’m not good enough.)
Yes: Compassionate language (e.g., I am good enough.)

No: Should
Yes: Want

No: Comparison and Jealousy
Yes: Connection, Collaboration, and Inspiration

No: Defeat
Yes: Change

No: Quantity
Yes: Quality

No: Restless nights
Yes: Embracing rest and stillness

No: Judgment
Yes: Compassion

No: Avoiding fear
Yes: Minimizing fear through action

No: Clutter
Yes: Space

No: Drain
Yes: Nourish

No: Hibernation
Yes: Exploration

No: Worry
Yes: Curiosity

No: Reactive
Yes: Proactive

No: Playing it safe
Yes: Leaping and Playing BIG

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image: stacey bradley (etsy: perle anne)

p.s. have you entered the shabby apple dress giveaway? love hearing the places you plan to wear the dress!

+++

What would you like to say less NO and more YES to in 2012?

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Jan 19

Love the Questions

This post is part of Reverb11. Through January 15th 22nd, I will be sharing my responses to the remainder of the prompts. My Reverb11 responses are a bit different than usual—more vulnerable, less polished, more frequent, and probably more interesting!

29. Questions.

What questions did you ask in 2011? (Author: Kaileen Elise)

I love questions—especially new questions. New questions always make me curious! I don’t love the questions that seem to constantly arise—the questions that demand investigation, change, and typically difficult to realize answers. These are the questions we run through our minds over and over again. These are the questions that are easier for us to ignore and push deep into our subconscious. In 2011, I focused a lot of my mental energy on these questions; the answers are slow to appear so great trust and faith in the process is necessary to believe that they will become visible at the right time. Below are a few questions from 2011, copied directly from the pages of my journal (note: I refer to myself as both I and you in the questions!).

—Should I give up on *this* dream?

—What do I need in this moment?

—What can I release from my life?

—Why are you doing *this* and not *that*?

—What am I avoiding? How can I reframe what I’m avoiding into something less cringe worthy?

—Given the current circumstances (which you can’t change), how do you choose to react?

—What mini-action can I take right now to move toward my desired goal?

—What are your options? What do you *want* to do? [this question is especially helpful when you feel lazy. write down all the possible items that you *want* to do and 9/10 times you'll be bored by the items after writing them down. it helps me get my groove back!]

—How can you bring a sense of security and ease to this situation (and similar situations in the future)?

—How can you actively use this lesson moving forward?

—How can I best protect my self-worth in this situation? (hint: magic ingredient=self-compassion)

—Are you being proactive or reactive?

—What evidence do I need to provide for myself to feel fulfilled?

What questions did you ask in 2011? What questions would you like to ask more in 2012? Any questions you would like to ask someone else?

photograph: maya lee

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Jan 17

If You Could Eliminate One Word from Your Brain Forever

This post is part of Reverb11. Through January 15th 22nd, I will be sharing my responses to the remainder of the prompts. My Reverb11 responses are a bit different than usual—more vulnerable, less polished, more frequent, and probably more interesting!

28. Vocabulary.
If you could eliminate one word from your brain forever—what would it be? (Author: Meadow DeVor)

One Word: Ruin

I tend to think in extremes—an all or nothing mindset (i.e., perfectionistic thinking). The most powerful way I reinforce this mindset: my language.

Ruin = Defeat. Crush. Break. Minimize.

These words lead to thoughts associated with “beyond repair” and “hopelessness.” To ruin is to weaken, to be left broken apart.

“This will ruin me.” could replace with “This will change me.”

Change is something I can work with. It’s a word that has options—hope.

The words we use have consequences. The words we subconsciously use have even greater consequences. Rather than focus on a word that quickly comes to mind, I dug a bit deeper and recognized words that I use often without even realizing. These are the words I want to bring awareness to. To eliminate them from my brain forever would be a great superpower; however, in reality, we must practice replacing these unwanted words with wanted words.

Notice –> Replace –> Rinse + Repeat

Over time, and with lots of repetition, you’ll notice yourself using the wanted words far more frequently than the unwanted, and this shift in communication lead to shifts in thoughts, feelings, actions, and consequences. Never underestimate the power of one word!

Check out Meadow’s post on this topic. She has some great word replacements in the post that I highly recommend printing to reference :).

image: uupp

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Jan 12

Surprises and Rituals

This post is part of Reverb11. Through January 15th, I will be sharing my responses to the remainder of the prompts. My Reverb11 responses are a bit different than usual—more vulnerable, less polished, more frequent, and probably more interesting!

25. Surprises
What was one thing that surprised you in 2011?

There were a lot of surprises in 2011. In particular, one surprise hurt a lot and is something I’m still trying to work through. For me, to “work through” means to unravel the lesson(s) from within this surprise and maybe even possibly turn this negative into a positive (time is going to be an important ingredient in making this happen). It was a hard surprise because it made me question my faith in those I intrinsically trust. Trust is not something that I give to others freely and when I do give it, I give it 100%. I need to learn to be more giving with my trust but to hold back from trusting to the point that I don’t listen to my intuition. It boils down to gaining more confidence in myself and in my intuition.

Now, let’s turn this around and look at a positive surprise from 2011! I am surprised at my resilience. And I am proud of this incredible resilience. It takes A LOT for me to give up—that’s something I just don’t do. If I believe in something, I will not give up. Throw me obstacle after obstacle, and I’ll keep showing up and giving my all. I guess you could say I’m one tough cookie who can’t be pushed down :)!

26. Rituals
What ritual(s) would you like to introduce into your life?

In 2012, my focus is on happiness + self-care. I want to introduce rituals that will allow me to regain a sense of wellness. My body has been under so much stress over the past few years and I need to take care of it and take care of “me.” I believe in introducing new rituals through tiny actions (over time these actions create tremendous change).

Currently, I’m eating breakfast with my hubby every morning and celebrating this time together. We’re making an effort to really pause for breakfast (no electronics) and begin the day on a clean slate.

Other rituals I would like to introduce: daily meditation, weekly exercise routine (yoga, pilates, strength training, cardio), tea and journaling in the evening, restart daily gratitude practice.

Are there any rituals you’ve recently added into your life? Or rituals you would love to add to your life?

image: cygne noir

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