Unfiltered Thoughts

Nov 24

Please Be Gentle

I wish I were all bubbly and full of smiles this time of year. But I’m exhausted and drained and really really need some time to breathe, serious time (like a few hours, pretty please!). And here I go again into victim mode – poor me, when really, if I look beyond my jaded view of right NOW, I have so much to be grateful for and so much amazingness to soak up. Why is it is so hard to shift to this valuable mindset when we need to the most? I can’t wait to spend a few days with my family, accompanied by (hopefully) a few minutes of non-work time to treasure the wonderful, the magical, and even the mundane.

My thoughts are scattered – those are the best, right — the 2 am unfiltered thoughts while transitioning from one thing to another and hoping for a glimpse of sleep :).

I want to share a few items I found online tonight that spoke to me, and maybe to you as well? Simple, yet powerful, and truly meaningful. But before I share, I want to let you know that I’m not in a “sad” spot just a bit of turbulence – lots of work, difficult but very important research, and stretching myself daily to reach beyond my comfort zone. I’m growing immensely and I am so grateful for that but at the same time I realize that I must be gentle, to myself and to those who may or may not be amidst their own personal uphill battles. Life is challenging and even more beautiful because of those challenges. So please remember to be mindful that we are all individuals moving through different journeys, be gentle with yourself and to those who may walk alongside you.

Image found on Mighty Girl (credits: Renee Fernandez via Sarah)

… Wishing you a beautiful Wednesday, filled with calm + gentle moments!

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Oct 12

Heart to Heart

Last week, I had so much fun learning about some fabulous new Etsy boutiques from the Share Your Hearts giveaway (giveaway winners to be announced this week!). Thank you for providing a wonderful distraction from the chaos and excitement that fills my life during these last two weeks of wedding preparation.

To be honest… I don’t feel ready, which is strange since we’ve been engaged for 2.5 years and dating for 8 years. I have ZERO nervousness surrounding the decision to spend the rest of my life with my best friend and prince charming… but I’m nervous about being “good enough” on the actual day. There are the silliest worries, but rather than hide behind a facade of everything is just “perfect” and “wonderful”… I thought I would share some of the randomness running through my mind, right now :). Any advice or “I totally had that thought or… have you had this random thought…” are one hundred percent welcome and would be lovely to read so I can know for sure that it’s not just me!

:: unfiltered random + somewhat embarrassing thoughts ::

… i wish i had done this and that for this person or that person to show my appreciation

… i could do something different than the “this and that” mentioned above to show different people my appreciation (but when do i have the time?)

… i am a horrible bride and should have done x, y, and z a year ago (why did i wait so long?)

… did i pick the right dress? it’s gorgeous, but is it the right dress for me?

… i have no idea how to write my vows… i’ve tried and tried but the words aren’t right

… will i have time to truly enjoy the actual day or will i be too busy pleasing everyone else?

… i wish i had done more cute little stuff for my hubby to be for the wedding day (and his birthday – the day before)

… will i be a good wife? what does that even mean — a good wife?

It has been a long journey to get to where I am today… where we are today as a couple. And I want to focus on that element of our wedding — this new chapter together. I want to relish our special moments and stop worrying about perfect anything. It’s a struggle, but one that I’m going to embrace rather than ignore. I want to enjoy this time as a couple and forget about expectations and labels. And the hubby to be is my partner in this battle — I couldn’t be luckier.

:: must share this video – you and me by dave matthews band – soo deliciously good ::

Disclaimer: For the next couple of weeks, I will try to balance my sappy wedding posts with “regular” posts but be prewarned that I haven’t prescheduled anything so I may be blogging a bit more about the journey down the aisle and all that comes with it!

… Anything you want to know about this time? Chime in and I’ll be sure to write about it!

images (top left to right, clockwise): AlicesLookingGlass, MyFairLadee, wrenandchickadee, vilarrealceramics, “make me happy” bear via etsy treasury (can’t find store name! please comment if you know the source)

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